I was 13. He was 15. We were 2 of the non-athletic campers seated underneath the large shade tree (I don't know what kind it was. Only that it was welcome relief from the hot sun during summer afternoon days.) This was my first weekend at Teen Retreat. My first time to be a camper the same time there were boys as campers. I had been looking forward to attending Teen activities at camp for about 2 years. One reason was that I could get away from my younger sisters. The other reason was that there would be boys.
As we sat under that tree, we shared our backgrounds with each other. He was in 8 grade. I was in 7 grade. He had visited family who lived in east Germany. I had visited family who lived in northern parts of the US. We shared our mutual dislike for gym class at school because it was not an encouragement to those of us who were athletically-challenged.
I left Bible camp that weekend excited about a new friend I had made. I couldn't wait until the summer camp week. I looked forward to becoming reacquainted with this boy. Unbeknownst to me we were going to visit Grandma during the teen week. It would be alright for me to attend a junior week (with just girls...and with my sisters). So I missed him that summer. The next summer arrived and he was in east Germany visiting his family. I'm sure we must have attended spring and fall teen retreats together but I was looking forward to spending a whole week with him as campers. 2 years later we finally were together at teen week. But by that time I had become very shy around boys & had difficulty talking with them...unless they were someone whom I had known for several years on a somewhat consistent basis.
I observed him from a distance though. And slowly realized over time that he might be a potential lifelong mate. He was sensitive to other's feelings, a good listener, would go out of his way to make the load a little easier, to name a few. One big plus was that he was willing to help the older staff members in whatever way they needed help. But the most important quality was that he loved the Lord and wanted to serve Him in whatever way He directed.
We went our separate ways but stayed in touch through camp. I started teaching school and one year decided to counsel at camp that summer. He ended up counseling also. Sitting in counselor training week, I remember thinking (it was like I was hit over the head with this thought), "if you're going to marry this boy, you'll have to be able to talk with him". I remember making it a point to seek him out to talk with him. And would you believe our conversations were just as easy flowing as they had been that very first spring retreat under that shade tree.
One August day I had taken a lady from church to an appointment. Upon arriving home there was a message on my answering machine that this boy had been in an accident. He had been almost to his job site when the accident occurred. I arranged to go to the hospital the next day. I would ride over with the ministry director (from the camp we attended). I didn't know this boy's parents so wasn't sure how they would respond to my being there. We stayed only a short time. I chose to go back 2-3 days later. Every 2-3 days I would make a trek to the hospital. But not before much time in prayer making sure this was what I should do. My one fear was that I would ruin the friendship we had.
During his stay in the hospital there was a news report that a set of parents had died and the children ages 5 and 3 years were in that same hospital. That brought back too many memories of many years earlier when I was the 5 year old in a different hospital with my 3 year old sister. All sorts of emotions rushed through my head. What if I saw those children (I knew I probably wouldn't but what if)? Would I be able to handle it? Would it be like seeing myself 21 years earlier? So I stayed home. I couldn't force myself to go to the hospital.
Very shortly I received a call from his mother. Would I please come visit him? So I took a deep breath and drove myself over there. Praying the whole time that I would not see those children. I also prayed that if I should see those children that the Lord would give me the stamina I needed to get my visiting done and get myself home. I did not see those children and had a wonderful time visiting him.
He was released from the hospital and we started doing a few things together just as friends. A Thursday evening might find us grocery shopping together. Saturday might find us at a local warehouse club with his parents. Sunday we might decide to combine our lunches so as not to eat alone.
Two years later he placed a ring on my finger and then five months later, he gave me his last name. This adventure has lasted for 18 years already and I'm looking forward to many, many more. I never knew that my love for him would continue to grow. He is truly my best friend and I am thankful we are traveling this road together.
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